Sunday, September 19, 2010

Back to School. Stalking is a skill set.

When I first started getting into Twitter, I followed all the big Mommy Bloggers. Nothing would be more exciting than getting a response, or horning in on a conversation one of them was having.

Until one night.

I told one of the women, in a tweet, that I thought she was fabulous, and I was stalking her with orange stained Cheetos fingers.

I laughed at my cleverness, until I logged back on to see that a couple of these big Mommy Blogger chicks were having a conversation about how they hated people who used the word: “stalk”.

Gulp. One even posted a link about a teacher that was killed by a stalker. (They didn’t note in the article if Cheetos had played a role in the murder.)

Wow. I felt terrible. Cuz I hate that kinda stuff.

So I went on to post an apology.

But I couldn’t. Cuz these two women had BLOCKED me! Not for using the “f” word, or bitching about my kids, but cuz I had manifested my adoration for them by telling them I was Twitter Stalking them.

Fast forward one year.

I still don’t use the word stalk much. Cuz I’m scared of the backlash. (Though anything that has to do with Cheetos and Stalking does make me laugh.)

But I have discovered that my stalking skills are a real boost to being involved in my childrens’ lives.

When we moved to Palm Springs, I checked out the local school, by assuming a semi-squatting position in the bushes (bougainvillea of course, kinda thorny) so I could watch the families and their kids interact with each other on their way into the school.

I actually wept, when I saw a Daddy and his little girl ride bikes to school. Then the Dad rode off, carrying that little pink bike on his shoulder.

I saw the PTA ladies talking to everyone.

I wanted to be part of that group.

So I straightened my legs, and walked into the group. That welcomed us (and my petrified, at that time, 7 year old).

So we signed up.

Every day (sometimes from the bushes, sometimes from out in the open) I watched these mothers embrace my daughter, a brand new student coming into the school in the 3rd grade.

And our lives have never been the same.

In case you want to know who I am? Drop by the middle school this week. I’m the mother who walks in the odd crouching position, hovering outside the 6th grade classrooms.

I see many touching acts of kindness. By kids and adults. Every day.

Cuz stalking? Baby, it’s a skill set.


  1. Some people take themselves waaaay to seriously. I would not have blocked you after a declaration of stalking devotion, especially if Cheetos were involved.

  2. Stalk me with cheats any day! Some of those tweeters
    Need to get a life!!

  3. 1st rule of stalk club, don't admit stalking, unless it's someone cool. not a friggin mommablogger. I mean like Johnny Depp? Brendan Fraser? Heck yeah bring on my coffee can potty for the stalk fest, but really people who think they are "special" and have some fake online power they aren't worthy of your quality stalkiness.

  4. People are lame sometimes. Stalk me stalk me! Wait... don't... I'm not that interesting. Good work on your stalking of the school, sounds like it worked perfectly!

  5. I would totally stalk you if you had cheetos. But only if I thought you might share with me *bats eyelashes*

  6. I am a master stalker - oops, used THAT word - but its true. Just ask my kids. It is how they survived to adulthood and how I learned to navigate the internet with stealth. Stalk on!


Tell me what ya think, babe!