Dear Viagra People,

First, I want to say: Thank you so much. I love how much you care.

And being important and cared about really matters to me.

And, there is nothing I love more than an intimate relationship with a friend, where we get down and dirty and talk about the REAL stuff: you know, sex; the real truth about menopause; how desperately I want to get on the Biggest Loser so I can be away from my family for three months; how my husband is sometimes just the teeny, weeniest bit of a moron; and then again, more stuff about sex.

And I love a friend that reaches out and really turns her caring into ACTION.

So thanks for all those emails. (I have become phone phobic since the inception of Twitter, etc.)

And thanks for caring about me and my, ahem, special relationship with my husband.

But can I just tell you something? We may be old, we may be fat (okay, I’M the fat one, but we are both OLD DAMMIT), we may be tired, overworked and cash poor, but THAT part? Uh, it still works. And by works? I mean we have still got a major THING going on!

Sometimes I feel guilty for how much I love and adore my husband. And how hot I am for him after all these years. (Okay, NOT every day or anything!!! Let’s not get ridiculous here.) And yeah, I no longer ride him like a bucking bronco (okay, I was never really “bucking”, but hey, I used to be on top).

So Viagra Drug Companies? We’re good. Well, for today.

So maybe keep those emails coming. After all, we are only getting older . . .