First Blog Ever or aka . . . I'm such a pussy

I am such a pussy. I listen to all these people talking about their blogs. I follow the links to blogs on Twitter. And I feel bitter. And afraid. Because I’m a pussy.

I have been too afraid to start. Cuz I won’t be as good, as authentic, as heartfelt, as fucking funny as the other bloggers. Some are beautiful writers. How can I compete with that? (Isn’t it cute how I think people other than my family and closest friends are actually going to be reading this?)

Here’s the deal: I’m great to have at parties. One, I get liquored up pretty quickly, and two, I tell a great story. But getting that story out of my mouth, when there is a martini in my hand, and onto the computer is ridiculously painful.

Why am I doing it? If I suck so bad? Because I have a fucking opinion about everything. And THAT, My Dears, is only fun if other people are listening. Which means: I need you.

I have things to share. About your shoes, your politics, your sexual orientation. And stories to tell. About my shoes (fabulous), my politics (liberal, fuck you Fox News) and my husband (a God among men, who is sometimes a moron).

And btw, why aren’t you following me on Twitter. Dude, don’t be a pussy.