Thursday, January 21, 2010

The Real World

The other day, someone told me to get out of cyber space and come back into the Real World. You know, the world where SHE is living. She is hardly the first to have said this to me, (and she did apologize) but, hey, it was a zinger.

You know the drill. In The Real World, where people are TOO BUSY to be bothered with “that waste of time”. In The Real World, where the kids aren’t at home and life has a different rhythm. You know, The Real World – where certain things are evil. Like Twitter. Not Facebook (no – everyone uses FB to connect with their “friends”). Not email (that is so 1999 and therefore, OK). No, the Evil “cyber world” would be the computer I use to do my work at home, so I can take my kids to school and pick them up, but still contribute to our family business. (All be it, in my jammies or stinky sweat clothes.) It would be the fact that I get joy out of connecting with other like-minded mommies out there (okay, by like-minded I mean a bit angry, truly profane, emeshed in all the pain-in-the-ass work of day to day Mommying).

I have two school age kids who think their hands would fall off if they were ever to pick up after themselves, a business to run, two people in my family have health issues and a constant sense that there is NO FUCKING TIME.

AND if I did have time, I would not get out of my stinky clothes I wore to walk the kids to school to spend it in THE REAL WORLD. The only Real World I’m interested in would be this: I would grab my Kindle and sit outside in the yummy Palm Springs sun and read. Or I would hook up with some other Mommies in Evil Cyber Space and feel connected in a really delicious way. Or I would watch an episode of Tabatha's Salon Takeover or Real Housewives (I don't care which one - they are all riveting to me.)

Someday I may live in her Real World, the lonely one without a large, crazy-ass cyber space, slightly dysfunctional family community. But for now, give me my Twitter Moms, Rabid Politicos, Fashion Mavens, Mommy Bloggers and a rare hour or two to myself. Because that’s pretty damned real to me.

1 comment:

  1. So I spent a few minutes reading each of your posts. May I say ... Are we fucking twins or what? Your "down" time sounds like my fantasy down time, except I don't have a Kindle. Primarily because I simply love books. And I don't have the fabulous Palm Springs weather, except for about 8 weeks in the summer here. Your screaming at the girls and flapping your hands around? Been there. Almost daily, as a matter of fact. Except I'm usually the distracted driver, and I am often yelling, "I SAID SHUT THE FUCK UP. YOU'RE MAKING ME NERVOUS!" Occasionally in my I-have-to-attempt-to-be-a-good-mother moments, I pull to the side of the road, pull the blackberry or book out of my purse and take multiple deep breaths until they comply. Then kick them to the curb at school and head straight for the Bloody Marys. Fuck work. I've been working for 3 hours before I even get to the office!
    Oh, girl, have we got to party.


Tell me what ya think, babe!