Monday, April 19, 2010
Who Are You? And What Have You Done With My Daughter Dammit?
I've heard people talk about the difficult tween years. But THOSE parents have problems with their children because they aren't “in-tune”, they aren’t really cool, connected parents. They haven’t done years (okay dammit, decades) of therapy.
They could have a better handle on their kids. I mean my daughter is 10 and she is fabulous: great student, sweet kid, tomboy, soccer player, devoted to her little sister (cuz they don't get playdates, so who else are they going to hang out with), a loving little cuddle bug.
Well then, WHO THE HELL IS THIS LITTLE WITCH IN MY HOUSE?
It happened overnight. This past weekend as a matter of fact. I've never seen such sobbing cuz it is 8:00 a.m. and she's not quite ready for school yet.
Or the crying because she lost her book. Or the pouting cuz there is foam on her milk in the morning. Or the complaining that there are too many apple slices in her lunch. Or the howling that “My sister won’t quit looking at me”. (Oh wait, maybe that is me howling?)
Oh, and she knows everything. I am trying to tell her how to clean the toilet: "I know Mom. I know, I know."
Really? She knows? When the fuck has she ever cleaned a damned thing in this house, let alone A TOILET?!? She’s going to clean the toilet like she cleans her room? What, she’s going to hide all the toilet dirt IN THE HAMPER, UNDER THE DIRTY CLOTHES?
Who is this overwrought (somewhat sweaty) child, who now hates bathing, has her eyes locked in a permanent eye-rolling position, wearing size 12 skinny jeans?
And what the fuck has she done with MY daughter?